Without Words
by jemisard
Summary: In Zanarkand, at the end of school, Tidus tries to hide a secret from Auron and he learns how much can be said without ever saying a word. shounenai if you want to take it that way


Tidus dropped his school bag onto the table and wandered out into the kitchen to find a drink. School had finished for the summer holidays, he would be seventeen in two weeks and he was playing for the Zanarkand Abes this Sunday.

Life would be perfect, provided that his guardian never saw the official notes from the school.

"Tidus."

He inwardly winced and turned around, glass in hand. "Yeah, old man?"

His guardian stood in the doorway. By now, Tidus recognised the intimidation tactic when he saw it. People in Zanarkand were generally lithe and small, and as such had smaller doorways. Since he was young, the older man had always loomed in doorways when he was disappointed in Tidus, his large frame filling the space and trapping Tidus in the room.

"Why did I receive a letter from the school asking me why I had not confirmed my attendance at the end of year assembly?"

Okay, still dealable. "Did you? I left the letter for you on the table, it must have gotten blown somewhere else." He smiled slightly. "I left it out for you, honest."

He got a cold stare from behind the dark glasses.

"Would I lie to you, Auron?"

Auron shifted his weight on his feet. "Yes. If you didn't want me to attend the assembly you could have just asked. I'm more curious as to why you're so desperate to keep me away."

Tidus smiled weakly. "I just don't want you to go. I don't wanna have you bored, surrounded by gushing parents whose kids did really well and having to say, 'yeah, I'm here for Tidus, all he managed to achieve this year was getting onto the Zanarkand Abes, he barely scraped through his classes, actually'." He scuffed his feet. "And I'm way happy that I did it, but I don't see the point in making you sit through a four hour assembly to watch other people's kids get awards."

He hoped, hoped like hell, that Auron would buy his story. It was mostly the truth at any rate.

Auron watched him for a few moments and then shrugged. "As you wish."

"Really?" Auron never gave up that easily. "You mean it? You won't be coming?"

Auron shrugged and stepped out of the doorway, leaning over Tidus to pluck a glass out of the cupboard. "This time. You lie to me again, Tidus, I will not be pleased. Do not risk breaking my trust."

The teenager winced. "I'm sorry..." Now he felt bad. They had a deal, Tidus was honest about what he was doing, where he was going and didn't lie to Auron, and Auron would nearly always let him do it, or at least explain why he was saying no. It was a pretty good deal, considering some of his friends' parents. "I just don't want you there. I'd be embarrassed."

The other man shrugged again. Tidus watched him for a moment, mixing up some foul concoction from orange juice and coffee.

There were times he would swear the man had never seen coffee before he rocked up on their door step.

"You're not mad?"

"No." He didn't look up from his measurements. "Just don't try it again, Tidus. I immensely dislike lies."

Great, now he felt even worse. "I'm really sorry."

"I know. We'll see how sorry the next time you're tempted to lie to me." He turned around, Tidus ducked the flicking ponytail with practised ease.

"I'm going out to play with some of the guys in the docks. Airla got a new blitzball we wanna try out."

Auron nodded and waved with his hand. Tidus caught the tiny wince of discomfort it brought about.

"You okay?"

"Fine, boy. Go play. If you're not home when I eat, you make your own."

"Yeah, yeah, I know the drill." He grabbed a bottle of sports drink from the fridge and disappeared out the kitchen door. "I'll be home later tonight!"

"Just go." Auron had the tiniest hint of a smile as he waved his ward out of the door.

0

Tidus met up with Airla, Janna and Iriko at the docks. They were bouncing the ball between them, Janna's cd player blasting music over the empty docks that the local teenagers played blitzball in.

"Tidus, you're late." Janna sniggered slightly. "Did the great red dragon get onto you?"

"Aw, leave him alone." Tidus kicked off his shoes and dropped his satchel on the planks. "He just wanted to know what the assembly was about. I asked him not to come, he agreed."

"Man, I wish my father was that easy going," Airla sighed wistfully. "My parents always come and they're always disappointed when I don't get anything but sports awards."

"Does he know that-"

"No." Tidus cut off Iriko before she could finish, but he knew what she was asking about. "I don't want him to know either, because then he'll want to read it and I don't want him to."

"Aw, I think it's sweet." Iriko sighed. She was the only girl in their group, as boyish as any of them but at times oddly seized by notions of sweetness and cute. Tidus suspected she spent too much time reading mangas and doujinshi. "Would it really be so bad?"

"Yes." Tidus turned up the music. "Are we playing or are we going to stand about gossiping like The Spider?"

Airla; balanced on his hands; was kicking the blitzball around on his feet. "I saw half The Spider today. Apparently they're getting some awards and putting on a performance at the assembly."

"God, I hate them," Iriko spat out. "I wish the great red dragon would use that sword on them."

"Iriko!" Tidus wailed. "Don't call Auron that!"

"Sorry, habit of a lifetime, Tidus." She giggled. "He is though. He's like a great big, grumpy dragon."

"He isn't." Tidus gave up. Iriko had always called Auron the great red dragon; to his face no less. Janna and Airla had picked it up off her. Auron just seemed to find it amusing and never said anything about it to Tidus or his friends.

"Ladies, can we play?" Janna cut in. "Tiddy's love life can wait until after."

"Janna!"

"Knock it off, children." Airla walked over on his hands, still bouncing the ball between his feet. "Let's blitz."

0

Tidus came back late, well past eleven. He and the others had grabbed some pizza on the way back from the docks and then played until clouds had obscured the moonlight and forced them to retreat home for the night.

He unlocked the front door with his key and crept in. Auron wouldn't be mad at him for coming home late, but he didn't want to wake the older man if he was actually asleep.

"I'm still up, Tidus."

God that annoyed him. He swore the other man read his mind at times. "Just wasn't sure," he called back.

He came into the living room. The lights were off but the drapes were open. A thunder storm was threatening on the far edges of the city.

"How bad is the storm meant to be?"

"Not too bad." The voice came from the corner of the room, Auron's usual armchair. "I checked the moorings, in case."

Tidus nodded. "In that case, I'm grabbing a quick shower first. Sea water doesn't feel so good after a while."

He got no response, so he padded out to the bathroom.

He had just gotten out of the shower when the storm hit them. It wasn't too bad, but storms always felt worse on a house boat. He came out dressed in his boxers and a t-shirt, ready for bed.

Auron stood by the window, staring outwards. His hand was on the glass, like he wanted to go out and touch the clouds.

"Auron?"

"I'm fine." His hand dropped and he turned around. A flash of lightning back lit him for a moment, dressed only in his sleep wear. One russet brown eye focused on Tidus sharply. "Tomorrow will be a dark day. You will not walk to the assembly. Take the bus."

"Auron?"

"Do it." The older man turned and headed for his bed room, the master bedroom of the place. "Trust me on this. Tomorrow will be a dark day."

Tidus nodded, even though Auron couldn't see. "All right."

But he was speaking to himself by then.

0

The next day was bright sunlight and not a cloud in sight. Tidus tried to heed Auron's warning that it was in fact a dark day and caught the bus to school as requested. He decided to walk home however, after the assembly.

He spotted Janna and Airla, watching The Spider from the side of the school theatre. "Hey guys."

"Did you know that The Spider can dismember the average school going male in less than three wickedly accurate and disdainful sentences?" Janna said.

He looked to the stage. The four girls on the stage, busy ordering about some year tens, were referred to by Tidus and his friends as The Spider, due to their vicious and nasty nature when found in a collective. Iriko had dubbed them that after observing that their behaviour was similar to that of the black widow spider.

"Yeah, I had guessed as much." Tidus looked about. "Where's Iriko?"

"Back with the other people getting academic awards." Airla grinned. "You should go join them, shouldn't you, Tidus? Since you're getting an academic award this year."

"Shaddup." He mumbled. "It's not like I actually thought it would win. I just wrote whatever came into my head. Not my fault she liked it so much."

"I think it's sweet." Iriko's light voice cut in. "A jock, driven for years to excel only in sports finds his inspiration from-"

"Iriko!" Tidus clamped a hand over her mouth. "Knock it off, you nutter. I think she just gave it to me because unlike half the class, I didn't write about my old man."

"I didn't write about Jecht," Janna cut in. "I wrote about Loca."

"Loca was the worse blitzer to ever taint the league," Airla said.

"Which is why he's so inspirational." Janna argued. "He stunk so badly, but everyone loved him anyway."

"Trying to model your life after him, Janna?" Airla quipped back.

"Spider." Iriko mumbled. "C'mon, Tidus, we gotta get backstage."

He let Iriko drag him off just as half of The Spider advanced onto the unsuspecting Janna and Airla.

Tidus almost pitied his friends.

0

The only thing worse than an assembly was sitting backstage waiting to accept an award at an assembly. Tidus looked at Iriko; who had already accepted two awards; and mimed choking himself.

She smiled back and turned to look out onto the stage. His gaze followed hers. The Spider were performing their play, a bad rip off of 'I Want to be your Canary' as a musical. It was a bit amusing. No where near as funny as people made it out to be.

Finally, it ended and the principal moved back on stage, clapping. "Thank you, girls. And now, to announce the writing achievement awards, our literary teacher, Miss Kodowaki."

Their teacher move out onto the stage. She was tiny, with huge glasses and an even louder voice when need be. She wore a neat skirt suit in grey, her fading hair bundled up on her head.

Of course, the bright pink and purple knee socks under her dress shoes ruined any illusion of respectability.

"Honoured guests, parents and students, I will try to be brief. This year we had three writing competitions for years ten, eleven and twelve. Year ten did a short story competition about the future of our world. Third place goes to Geul for his story about a world dominated by robots, second to Alain for her story about a world with no oceans and first place goes to Yoi for her post apocalyptic story of a world with no machines."

The three students collected their awards in turn, shook hands with the mayor and moved off.

"Year twelve did poetry about the most intense emotion they have ever felt. Third place goes to Lehra for her poem 'When Father Left'. Second goes to Dotu for his poem 'My Baby Girl' about his sister; and first place to Enence for her poem 'Fade to Black' about her sister's suicide."

The three of them; dressed in their graduation robes; came up to accept their awards. The little girl in the audience who cheered loudest appeared to be Dotu's little sister, the topic of his poem.

"Year eleven were given the task of writing an essay about the person who was most influential and important in their lives. Third place goes to Iriko for her essay about her baby sitter." Iriko went and got her award, winking at Tidus. "Second place goes to Emma for her essay about her second mother." Tidus applauded and tried to wipe the sweat from his hands. "First place; and this was a surprise; went to Tidus, for his essay about his guardian."

He walked on stage, tried to pretend he was just accepting another sports award. He took it, shook the principal's hand and smiled like he was expected to and stepped off stage and back around the back to line up for the sport's awards with Janna and Airla.

Airla winked at him. "Was the dragon out there?"

"No." Tidus hissed back. "He said he wouldn't come, so he won't."

"Shh." The teacher in charge glared at them and they fell silent again.

0

The assembly was a record four and a half hours long. As they walked out onto the oval; the short cut back to the docks; Airla impulsively flipped to his hands, over to his feet and back to his hands. "Man, it feels great to be on holidays at least."

"I liked the reading of Enence's poem." Iriko said dreamily. "It was so beautifully tragic."

Tidus watched his friends chatter to one another. The sun was bright, but he felt uncomfortable all of a sudden as they walked into the trees separating the edge of the oval from the streets. "Guys, I've got a-"

"Well, if it isn't the little boys."

The group turned to look at The Spider. Iriko slunk behind Tidus, clutching her bag in front of her as though to shield herself from the insults.

"It's the end of year, can't you harpies leave us alone." Janna yawned to emphasise his indifference to the girls.

Anni leant forwards, her ponytail swinging. "Iriko. You had your hair done for this didn't you? Your dreadlocks are shorter."

"Leave her alone," Tidus stood up taller. "You're just jealous because you always come a pale second to Iriko."

"Oh, Tidus, feel up to exchanging words with us?" Kytti smirked. "How abut we move onto something you're more familiar with? Like your guardian." She turned to her friends. "I think it's touching that Tiddy wrote about his guardian. No matter how suspicious it is that a thirty five year old man lives with a sixteen year old boy." She turned back to him. "It's just like one of those disgusting and immoral doujinshi Iriko loves. Old man pedophile and stupid young boy who thinks he's more than an easy fuck."

Tidus grabbed Janna's hand before he smacked Kytti in the face. "She isn't worth it, Janna. She's just jealous because she was spawned and never had someone who spent time raising her into a decent human being."

Anni opened her mouth to retort, but her face suddenly went pale, her mouth dropping open into a scream. "Fiends!"

The teens spun to look behind them. Three large fiends, looking like giant ugly lizards, were advancing on them menacingly.

Instinctively, Tidus shoved Iriko behind him and started backing up. Auron had always told him if faced with a fiend, don't turn your back on it until you have a good head start.

"Back up. Don't run. Don't look away." He hissed at The Spider. He disliked them, but he didn't want their deaths on his conscience. "Just retreat slowly and steadily."

The five girls; The Spider and Iriko, backed away until they were a fair way off. Tidus spared a second to glance at them. "Run. Run like hell and don't stop until you reach a large group and get some bloody help."

He was terrified. More scared than he'd ever been. But Auron had always emphasised the need to be calm and collected, even if unarmed. The illusion of power was as important as power itself against fiends.

"Airla. Janna. Back up behind me. Form a triangle, just like a blitz offensive. It makes us seem stronger."

The two boys did as they were told. Tidus heard Airla whimper slightly.

It was enough to trigger off the fiends. The lead one leapt towards Tidus, teeth and claws bared.

Tidus screamed and raised his arms to try and shield his face.

The blow never hit. He opened his eyes, saw a red kimono fluttering in front of him, the lizard firmly gripped on Auron's armoured arm.

The man flung it away, his feet skidding apart. The sword was brought from the relaxed position on his shoulder to a two handed grip in front of him.

The front lizard leapt.

Auron moved, his sword slicing through it like it was butter. The mangled remains hit the ground and shuddered once, falling still.

The second was already upon Janna. Once more the sword came down and the creature's head rolled from its body, just shy of grabbing onto Janna.

The third leapt and latched onto Auron's unprotected arm. He grunted and tried to shake it off but the teeth sank in further.

Tidus stared in horror as blood ran down Auron's tanned skin. Without a second thought he grabbed his sports award; a trophy he had accepted on behalf of the blitzball team; and smashed it onto the creature's head repeatedly.

Blood splattered his hand and it leapt off Auron, rounding on him instead. Its claws swung but seemed to missed and then in a flash of silver it was dead before him.

He looked up Auron and at his arm. "Are you okay?" He tried to ask, but it slurred slightly.

"Tidus?" That was Airla but he couldn't see the other boy.

He was lying down, and he was aware that there was terrible pain in his chest now. He looked and saw a figure was pressing Janna's jacket onto his chest and blood was spreading over it.

"Oh shit." He muttered. "Auron? Auron?"

A bloodied hand held his own, so much larger than his. "It's okay, Tidus." A bottle was held to his lips, he drank obediently. It was sweet, almost too sugary.

"Auron, was I hit?"

"Don't talk. You, run. Get help. You, put your fingers there, no, there. Press down hard, you won't hurt him. No, he's not dying. He's just in shock. The potion will stop the bleeding soon."

He felt strong fingers pressing on his side and another bottle was at his lips, or maybe it was the same one again. He drank all of it and let his head relax back.

"Auron?"

"Shh." Gentle hands lifted him up and he was being wrapped in something warm. A memory came to him, Auron wrapping him in his kimono when he was young and had gotten lost for two days after he went to find his mother.

He was lifted up into warm arms and he dimly remembered Auron's injuries. "You shouldn't.... you got hurt."

"Shh. Stop chattering, Tidus. I'm fine. You, Janna? Move his head against my shoulder, I don't want it to loll, it might damage his neck."

His head was moved. It was comfortable now, the pain in his stomach was gone. "I'm real tired, Auron."

"You can sleep, it's okay. You don't have a head injury."

So he did.

0

He woke up back home. His hands felt his stomach, but there was only a lingering tenderness when he poked where the lizard had gouged him.

He got up. The clock said it was two am, so he'd only been out for twelve hours.

He padded out to the hall, surprised to see the living room light on.

Then again, maybe not. "Auron?"

The older man looked up as he stepped into the living room. He was obviously dozing on the couch, bandages wrapped around both his arms. "My god, are you all right, Auron?"

"Don't ever do that again, Tidus." Auron growled.

"What?" He felt a stab of panic.

The older man stood and stalked towards him. "Don't ever attack a fiend unless you are armed with a real weapon. I can take their blows, you cannot."

Strong arms swept around him, pulling him close. The sudden display of affection surprised him, he let his arms wrap around the man's waist, his head coming to lean on one shoulder. "I'm sorry. I just freaked out when I saw the blood." He could feel skin under his cheek and dimly realised Auron was only wearing his pants. "I just lost it. I'm sorry. Don't be angry."

"I'm not angry, Tidus." Auron's cheek came to a rest on the top of the blonde head. "I was convinced you were going to need hospitalisation for a while. If I hadn't had those potions it could have been a lot worse."

"You were worried?" Of course he was worried, but Tidus wanted to hear the words. He was feeling scared now, scared at how stupid he'd been doing that. Auron had already told him he had been a fiend hunter at one point. He would have been fine.

"No. I wasn't worried." He held Tidus at arm's length. "I was terrified, you stupid boy. I thought you were dying when I saw the blood on your chest."

One large hand gently stroked the scars. Thanks to the potions they would fade away to virtually nothing after a while.

He shivered at the intimate touch. "What were you doing there?"

"Hunting the fiends. What were you doing there?" Auron narrowed his eye.

"I was walking... oh. I was meant to bus, hey?" He looked down. The bright sun and the warm weather had made him forget Auron's warning. "I'm sorry. I forgot."

Auron sighed. "I figured. You were lucky I was already on their trail." He pulled Tidus close again, one hand held the blonde's head to his guardian's shoulder. "I couldn't face losing you, Tidus. Don't ever put me in that situation again."

"I promise," Tidus whispered. He had never seen Auron looked so scared in his life. It was unnerving. "I'm so sorry."

Dammit, now he was crying like a little girl. From fear of being so badly hurt, from fear at seeing Auron so scared; from anger at himself for being so stupid. He tried to pull away but Auron wouldn't let him, holding him closer.

"Shh. It's all right." He was gently rocked, a steady heartbeat under his ear. "You're going to be fine."

They stood like that for some time until eventually Tidus pulled away, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. He looked up and studied Auron, reading what he could see.

He'd never said it but he knew; without a doubt; what the man had long been saying without words. He had taken the fiend's bite for Tidus, and now his russet eye was red from tears.

"I love you too, Auron." He buried himself back his guardian's arms, satisfied with the light brush of Auron's lips over his forehead as he cuddled close. "I love you too."


End file.
